2019 – Kicking Horse

Prologue

We begin by reminding all Half Fasters of the vigorous dialogue about destinations for the momentous 40th anniversary trip, which as per HFSC custom, was determined to be Revelstoke, Canada at the closing dinner on the 39th expedition. You will note by reading the 2018 Captain’s Log that in fact “Revy” did not happen, as opt-outs by key personnel, driven mainly by travel logistics, caused Revy to be a non-starter. Reid makes a non-executive decision after consulting with several Founders to defer Revy in favor of Vail, the long-time defacto “home” of the HFSC. At the closing dinner of the 2018 Vail trip, Revy is selected for the 41st in 2019, subject to onsite research by Reid in 2 weeks time.

As it turned out, Reid’s journey to Revy confirmed that it was in fact a non-trivial location to access, hidden deep in the interior of BC, along a stretch of highway affectionately referred to as the Powder Highway. Renowned for a multitude of heli and cat skiing operations, the area is remarkable for its scenery, narrow passages between steep mountain walls, prone to avalanches. Despite the obvious attraction for Big Dog types like Smith, Hammer and the Crain Unit, fellow Big Dog Reid made another executive decision that travel to Revy, especially for those Southern types from Florida and Tennessee arriving at night, would not be practical, and in fact might be quite risky. Hence, a new location was selected in the Canadian Rockies, Kicking Horse (KH) in Golden, BC, with its neighbor, the acknowledged jewel of the Rockies, Lake Louise……

Arrival Day –  Ice Road Truckers!

Notwithstanding the easier and safer option of getting to KH, this was nothing less than an unforgettable journey. All Half Fasters arrived in Calgary by mid-day, and loaded into 2 suitably large SUV’s for the drive. Unfortunately, Kevin once again suffered the Bogle travel curse, and never made it on time. His flights were delayed such that he would not arrive until that night…..

After a Costco stop to procure the necessary supplies (read food, snacks and booze), the 2 SUV’s headed for the Rockies, at approximately 3PM. The drive to KH was to take approximately 3 ½ to 4 hours, along the TransCanada Highway into Banff National Park, before taking the Stephens Pass across the Great Divide through Yoho National Park into BC. The weather gods however had a different idea…..

About 45 minutes out of Calgary, well before the entrance to the park, we hit a blinding snowstorm, and traffic came to a complete halt. We waited…..and waited……..and waited………… As it turned out we sat on that highway for hours, not moving and watching the clock tick. We learned that the highway was in fact closed in both directions just in front of us, while they endeavored to clear a multivehicle accident involving both cars and transport trucks. Reid’s long time friends, Mike and Kathy Baker, who had collaborated on arrangements for KH, were in touch by cell phone, and said they were returning to Calgary, before setting out the next morning. This in fact was actually a good thing for Kevin, since now he could have a ride to KH, and would not have to rent a car and drive himself deep into the Rockies!

Meanwhile, out on the TransCanada…..the HFSC team was getting increasingly restless, particularly Reid, who knew that there was still a significant drive ahead, one not to be taken lightly, especially when darkness fell.

After a recon mission by Richard, and a brief team discussion, the HFSC elected to take the inner shoulder of the highway up to a relatively shallow part of the median, and cross over to the highway going the other way. There was substantial risk in this move, as getting stuck in the median would have been an absolute disaster, and likely punishable by a stiff fine from the RCMP. Hammer’s SUV did not have 4 wheel drive, yet the years of experience honed in the Colorado Rockies served him well, as he went first, blazing trail, closely followed by the SS Reid, which did have all wheel power. Safely across we then reversed our direction, and took the next exit in order to bypass the accident. We of course ran right into another traffic jam, as all other vehicles behind us were forced to exit the TransCanada at the same point. We finally made it to Canmore a couple of hours later. A brief stop at a local gas bar for coffee and snacks and a bio break, before setting out on the still considerable drive to Golden, through the Rockies, and now in the dark….. After a long, long day’s journey into night, we finally arrived at our accommodations at KH, some 7+ hours after starting in Calgary, tired, hungry, thirsty and somewhat strung out……

Day 1 – Kicking Horse Kicks Ass!

Before describing the day 1 action on the slopes, a short note about the accommodations in KH. In a word, superb! We had a large, luxury mountain chalet where we all could stay, with beautiful large bedrooms, a fully equipped kitchen, huge great room, and of course the essential necessities of high end grill and hot tub.

Not quite ski in/ski out (as Rob Crain discovered on the morning of Day 1), more of a short walk out, but ski in.

All in all however, superior accommodations, and was fully endorsed by Lee Williams, who considered it only a slight notch above the Elk Country Inn however….

As for the mountain, KH has the greatest concentration of blacks and double blacks that are lift accessible of anywhere we’ve ever been. This was a Big Dog’s heaven, and would have been absolute nirvana if we had gotten a serious dump of snow…. Unfortunately this did not happen, but we had some fresh, and the conditions were quite decent, even on the steeps.

Reid’s longtime friends Mike and Kathy Baker, who are essentially locals at KH, provided excellent tour guide services for the HFSC, at all levels. In addition, the Bakers had brought Kevin with them from Calgary, and he also was on the mountain by late morning!

The Bakers proved to be extremely valuable, since they showed us all the good routes, the best snow, and for certain big dogs, Mike’s guide services got them into great stashes we would otherwise never have found.

Big Dog vertical recorded for Day 1 was 27,484 feet.

The other noteworthy thing about Kicking Horse is it actually has a fulltime resident grizzly bear, named Boo! The main chair passes over Boo’s regime (well-fenced btw with a mild electrical charge….), so in the summer months, one can see Boo presiding over his enclave, and waiting for food to be dropped into his pen. Of course in the dead of winter, Boo is happily asleep, snoring away and oblivious to all the skiers going by…. Including the infamous HFSC!

Day 2 – The Jewel of the Rockies – Lake Louise

On Day 2, the group split up, with some members staying put at KH, while Reid led a field trip to Lake Louise. This beautiful morning showed the Canadian Rockies in all their glory, as the drive from Golden to LL had gorgeous sunshine hitting the mountain tops.

Arguably one of the most beautiful places to ski anywhere, Louise did not disappoint. We did the full mountain, lots of high speed cruising, some steeps off the peak, and off the backside later in the day, where it can be seriously steep. Chris took Lee on the more scenic route around the back, while Hammer, Crain and Smith took on some of the steeper pitches. In Lee’s words he felt really good about skiing with big dog Reid, until he learned that Chris’ hip was so bad as to need replacement….. On Day 2, Big Dog vertical was 20,837 feet.

It is worth noting that the nickname for Lake Louise is “Lake Lindsay”, in honor of Lindsay Vonn’s many World Cup downhill and Super G victories there. The HFSC crew skied both the men’s and women’s downhills at a high rate of speed in an effort to do justice to the site, but probably a tad slower than Lindsay….. We also looked around for her as we toured her namesake mountain, as our Chief Marketing Officer Peter Smith wanted to tell her all about the HFSC brand….. unfortunately she was nowhere to be seen.

It should be noted that in parallel with the annual trip, and in this case an on-site search for the skiing celebrity Ms. Vonn, a concerted effort was made to solicit her appearance at the 2020 trip, via an exchange with a booking agent claiming to have the ability to secure her presence. Herewith is the summary of the email exchange and the subsequent call to action from yours truly, the Interim Acting Assistant Deputy CMO…

“So HFSC, we can realize our CMO’s wine-fueled conceptual dream by having Lindsay join us in Aspen! And I have already pre-emptively taken the usual $40-$50K appearance fee off the table, applying the time tested Don Bogle/Lee Williams negotiation tactics, which I witnessed firsthand during my years in Phoenix, and subsequently saw redeployed in many a Liar’s Dice game.

So it’s simply a matter of agreeing on what to offer Lindsay (through this guy Jordan Levin), and building each HFSC member’s share into the cost for the upcoming trip (those HFSC members who are not attending this year’s meeting will also be billed btw). I figure we can further entice her by offering her a number of unique things (additional ideas welcome):

• honorary membership in the HFSC of course
• exclusive opportunity to be the global spokesperson for the HFSC, as she travels the world, doing appearances, skiing with celebrities, etc.
• her own set of HFSC logo wear, hat, pullover, etc., all to worn in every public appearance from now on (including her wedding)
• her own room, on any future HFSC trip she decides to join (she can even bring PK Subban)
• waiver of the usual HFSC initiation of snow rolling followed by the hot tub ( wait, no strike that, we won’t offer that, too valuable!)
• free Liar’s Dice lessons from the prestigious Bogle/Williams school, in which she almost can’t lose
• personal lessons in poker pool from yours truly, which are probably best done 1 on 1, in a private setting, and not including PK
• subject to her singing ability, lead singer in the HFSC All Star band, suitably attired of course (maybe even if she can’t sing)
• an autographed and truly authentic 1970’s vintage one piece ski suit, provided by the only owner of such a suit, Frank Rottier
• ski lessons in the time-honored, upright, knees and feet bonded together, 1960’s style, by the only person left on the planet who can do this and make it look good, Rob Crain
• other compelling ideas which I am sure you all have

 So clearly, with all this high value swag etc. that we are offering, she will almost certainly jump at the chance to come join us, and thus offer to do so for a much more modest fee. What do you all think – shall we offer $10K, which will probably work out to far less than $1000 each? 

Probably best that you give me (and the CMO) your feedback, and your monetary commitment asap, as I am sure Lindsay’s calendar will be filling up fast…

Look forward to your thoughts….

  – Interim Acting Assistant Deputy CMO

There were a few sparse responses to this…… but certainly not the tsunami of positive reinforcement expected by the IAAD CMO. There was however an offer by Dr. Gerry Sullivan aka “Sully”, to apply his unique game theory techniques to the process, which would not only have LV join us for the 42^nd annual, but would in fact have her pay to do so!!

“I have been reluctant to enter this conversation but with all of this information, I feel I must advise.    I run a consulting practice that uses complex mathematics (game theory) to optimize negotiation strategy to achieve the best possible outcome during negotiations.  Our normal fees for this sort of engagement would be in the order of $75K US but I would be willing to waive this on a goodwill basis for all of my good friends in the HFSC.  More than happy to work with Big Dog Bogle/Williams – she will be paying us by the time we are through.”

At the time of this writing, we (and Lindsay) continue to await the results of Sully’s efforts…….

Apres ski was a treat in itself, as we went across the valley to the Chateau for cocktails. No one can argue the magnificence of the setting, a gorgeous hotel on the shores of Lake Louise, with skaters and ice sculptures, horse drawn sleighs, and even an outdoor ice bar!

We elected to enjoy the view from the bar inside, which looks out on the magnificent setting, and thoroughly enjoyed an apres ski beverage and nosh.

Day 3 – Closing it Out at Kicking Horse

For Day 3, we all skied KH again, enjoying the guide services of the Bakers, and maximizing our last day in the Rockies. Once again, we were blessed with a clear day, and good snow conditions, allowing us spectacular views at the top, and great skiing all over the mountain. Final Day 3 vertical was 25,082!

Closing Dinner and Epilogue

The traditional closing dinner was held at a very nice local restaurant in Golden, Eleven22. Over a fine meal with good local BC wine, we once again set about the process of deciding where the following year’s trip would be. A number of the usual suspects were on the short list, with the addition of Mammoth in California, where Kevin had actually stayed at one point. However, Aspen Snowmass rose to the top and was selected for the 2020 trip, HFSC 42.

A great deal of leftover food and wine was given to the Bakers for the excellent services they had provided. On a crystal clear and typically frosty (-25C) day we left our mountain abode in entourage back to Calgary for the flights home. We nod to the Three Sisters as we drive by……

See you in Aspen in 2020!!

This year’s Half Fasters:

• Chris Reid (Trip Organizer)
• Peter Smith
• Rob Crain
• Mark Hammer
• Richard Corles
• Ed Szkaradnik
• Lee Williams
• Bill Williams
• Kevin Bogle